Money Problems - Money Habits

Changing money habits can be difficult. It can shake things up emotionally, with your relationships, and your career. It's easy to just give up and retreat to what feels safe. Get the help you are worthy of through coaching. Mine comes with a 30 day money back guarantee.

i be me

I need the blank page. Not another piece of input. Put down Pinterest and Fiverr. Let go of O Mag and countless marketing emails. And yes, cut off the TV. Hire a babysitter even if I'm not making direct cash, it's ok. Now write. Output. Output. Output in the peace. In the presence. Let it flow onto the swath of blankness that is my tablet or in this case the notes function of my phone as I nurse. Allow myself the peace and harmony of my own thoughts merging mingling growing becoming into pieces of me. Parts of me, exressions stretchings. Partisan to myself now yet connected more wholly to my world, I write. I create the expression of self I am most. I be me. I be me.

Clear Out The Clutter

Clearing out the clutter of our lives helps us make space for more of our good to come in. This is true on the physical and spiritual level. We clear out our closets and storage spaces and we all of a sudden feel clearer headed and more peaceful. Many times, other problems in our lives work themselves out after a thorough clearing of space. The same is true for clearing out our internal space. By forgiving the things we judge as bad we clear mental, spiritual and emotional space for more wonderfulness to come to us. By forgiving, we open our hearts to joy. We see more clearly the possibilities before us and we make better decisions.
Forgiveness Steps
Via Gabrielle Bernstein
http://www.gabbytv.com
Recognize (acknowledge what happened)
Record (write down your feelings about it)
Release (begin to release the feelings)

Via Colin Tipping author or Radical Forgiveness
http://www.radicalforgiveness.com/contentnew/downloads

UnderEarning Part 1

What is Coaching 2

What you focus on changes. 

This is the scientific crux of coaching.  What we choose to focus on we can change and change for the better. 

For me the shift happened with my first coach.  When I began with her, I was completely unfocused and not quite willing to admit it.  I knew, vaguely a lot of the things I wanted to accomplish but the busy work of my next lesson plan and being a coach were at the top of my list, not to mention any other number of hobbies I would begin and drop at a moments notice.  Once I plunked down the cash that changed significantly.  I knew I wanted to get my monies worth and that cash made the commitment stronger. 

She helped me narrow down my goals and put the important ones first.  My thinking cleared up and I felt so centered and present.  I was in charge of my time and my life, not circumstances or the next urgency.  Those urgencies that I figured out were really created by me and not being thrust upon me. 

The best part was that I discovered all of this on my terms in my way.  It wasn't someone preaching at me or telling me what to do.  I was learning what I needed to learn at the time I needed it.

Whether it's more mindfulness with your kids or a great promotion at work or finding our soulmate, coaching opens the doors wider by cultivating in us the transformation so that it occurs in our outer world. We are released from our own unproductive thinking.

By taking the time and money to commit to the coaching agreement, we exponentially increase our focus and our ability to make lasting important changes. We create the change we want in our lives.  And this change is easier, clearer and fun.

While we act partly as coach, mentor, personal trainer and manager, getting you to think more deeply and focus is where our power lies. The big part of what we do is act as a mediator to your thinking allowing you to think clearly, quickly and toward your own best interests.

Coaches are skilled at asking you the right questions, responding in a way that enhances clarity leading you to your own insights. It's a deep relationship between coach and coachee.  Profound insights leading to profound change.  This is where the magic happens in coaching conversations.  Why?  Because we're specifically trained to guide you to your best thinking and away from circular thinking and vagueness.

By getting to your core authentic self we help you create profound internal and external change.  We get you past your blind spots and over or around real and perceived obstacles.  Instead of a year from now saying I wish I had started sooner, you'll be basking in the glow of some of your greatest achievements.

Next Steps...

A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step. -Chinese Saying

Think it's hard to take that next step? It often feels that what we're dreaming of is forever out of reach or we put it off until tomorrow, next week, next year. Waiting means more waiting.

1. Take small step. Any little step will do. The next day, take another small step.

2. Create room in your mind and heart for forward movement by letting yourself believe it's possible. Letting go of perfection and "if only this" or "if only that" works wonders for your creative mind.

3. Ask what small thing CAN I do here? Breathe. Give yourself time and space to answer.

When I first had my oldest daughter, I thought it might be forever before I got back into my mediation practice. Any moment for focusing on myself in such a quiet way was usually taken up with nursing or catching up on sleep. It was hard to concentrate. It was hard to focus inward when I was the main caregiver for her. I was used to going into meditation fairly easily and now I needed more time to quiet myself - time I didn't feel I had. In fact, I focused on how much time I didn't have. I focused on how I didn't have money for a babysitter and why getting a babysitter for just 20 minutes seemed silly. I focused on the fact that I was nursing and it was hard to get away. I focused on every part of the not having time.

Maybe you've made a similar transition in your life - a new job, a faster pace, more responsibility, a move, a change in the family. In the midst of all that goes on in our lives, it can be hard to focus on what's really important, what our next steps should really be. For me, I had to let go of doing any meditation in large chunks. I realized if I could only focus for five minutes, then 5 minutes would be progress. I also realized I could use help. I downloaded guided meditations which helped me stay focused. If I did get distracted, the words of recordings helped me get back into the meditation. My spiritual side opened back up for me because I was willing to take small steps. The steps beyond that have just flowed.

We can all take small steps to reach our goals. We don't have to know how you're going to reach the destination. The next step doesn't have to be the perfect step. We can let go of the "yes, buts." We just have to start somewhere. There's so much power in beginnings. And it's amazing what possibilities will open up to us once we take that step.

Tell me your story below and...
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What Is Coaching

What if your life got more joyful, satisfying and easier? Coaching is a natural part of life. Great business leaders use coaches to develop their employees. Coaches help by clarifying thinking, giving feedback, providing support and maintaining a healthy level of challenge.

Overall, coaching is about facilitating positive change. It is also about getting where you want to go easier and faster while reducing complications and roadblocks.

Now, more than ever, people are seeing the value of having a coach. Just as sports coaches give feedback and keep their teams on track, life coaches help all of us do and be our best. A coach is someone who is totally in your corner, focused totally on you. You have regular appointments to work on your goals and dreams so that time doesn’t fall through the cracks.

Think for a moment on the idea of the hero and the hero’s journey. It is the tale of a person leaving a familiar world, usually encountering a guide/teacher, experiencing an adventure/quest, meeting obstacles, learning and developing something new within themselves and then returning home to utilize that knowledge in helping the community in some way. Hero stories resonate with us so much because we all are on our own hero journey. We live for a purpose and we work to reach our goals. In that process we are changed. In a very real sense, coaching is a natural progression of this hero journey and coaches are the guides that people are utilizing to facilitate their own progress of personal development.

Your Life Is Your Job
You are on a hero’s journey. Remember, no one can do what you were put here to do. You are worth every penny and every bit of energy you expend on you. and Michael Jordan all had coaches. Isn’t your life really you main job? Show up for all the important roles and relationships in your life being your best and giving your best with the help and clarity of coaching.

Accountability Partner

A super great way to stay in action is to get an accountability partner. This partner is someone you have weekly meetings with (in person or over the phone/skype) to discuss what your goals are, how the week went and what plans you are committing to for the upcoming week.

How does an accountability partner weekly meeting help?

• Knowing someone is going to ask you about your progress.
• Verbalizing what's really important to you & your progress is amazingly energizing and focusing for the brain.
  
• When you spend dedicated time on YOU, the wiring of your brain changes. This focus and rewiring makes the change clearer and easier to make.
  

This weekly meeting will do wonders for your focus & progress!

When I speak to my coach, I know that she is going to ask me about everything I have committed to for the past week. As the week progresses, I hold myself more accountable and have a stronger commitment to my own actions. I begin my next week much more clearly focused on what my heart's priorities are. Instead of floating through the week on auto-pilot, I move much more mindfully and purposefully. I am grounded and centered in the life I want to be living.

Your accountability partner can be a

• professional coach,
  
• a friend,
  
• mentor,
  
• family member
• etc.
  

Your choice does need to be someone that can refrain from judging and offering much advice. The meetings are about you, your thinking and your progress, not their thinking or their way of doing things.

If and when you get a partner, I would love to hear how it goes for you.

Charting Your Progress

Charting your progress with you goals is a great way to stay on track and make sure the work you're doing is working.

Examples:

• Want to lose weight? Weigh yourself today and chart your progress on a simple graph.
• More Mindful? Use a scale or percentage. Maybe you'd like to be mindful 90% of the time. Where are you now? 10, 20, 30%? Chart your progress to stay on track.
• Want to grow your business? Evaluate your current income and expenses. Write it down. Decide on your goal and chart yourself weekly or monthly.
  

Action

It's almost October. It's been a full nine months since many of us made new year's resolutions. We may have found that sticking to those gets a bit lost in the busyness of life. So what to do?

Revisit your resolutions.
Write them down.
Prioritize.
Envision Success.
Enlist an Accountability Partner & Meet regularly. (friend, life-coach, trainer, etc.)

You don't have to wait a year to resolve for something better.

An Unforgiveness Story

My "Un-forgiveness of an Institution"

I was right and THEY were wrong. We opened the accounts at two separate banks in Florida because there were branches in Ohio, directly across the street from where we were moving to. Everything was fine. We had our own accounts and a joint account. This way we could transfer money to pay bills and cover checks and expenses as needed yet still have our own spending money. Great!
The bank then was bought out by another larger bank. Soon, I found that my account was to be changed to the new bank system. But not my husbands nor the joint account. The bank across the street from me, remained with the old system as well.

Being a new stay-at-home mom and working here and there as a tutor, I needed to deposit checks on a regular basis. I couldn't do that at the branch across the street. Ridiculous right? What kind of system was this? Their solution? The branch actually had to overnight my checks to a new branch to have them deposited. WTHeck? Really? I have to wait extra days to have the check deposited? Yep. I did.

Not only this, my husband's account and joint accounts were no longer linked to my account. If Greg was out of town, he could not get money to me, and I could not get money from the joint account and into my account without some elaborate scheme.

I was livid. It was ridiculous. I told the story over and over again. I ranted about it in my head. I was RIGHT. Even the bank workers were frustrated and upset by the way the changes were being done, further solidifying my position of me being right and the bank being wrong. I mean, I had done what was necessary to make this smooth transition to Ohio and I had all of this taken care of! I was done. I shouldn't have to do anymore.

After months of relatively minor but irritating frustrations, the bank finally switched over all accounts. But guess what, I had many choices from the beginning. If I could have let go of being right, I could have thought more rationally and creatively about the situation. We could have closed our accounts and opened new ones together at the same bank. I could have closed only my account and opened a new one. If I had not been so stubborn I would have found out earlier that if I just deposit the check at the ATM, the money would register in my account right away because those were the rules of the bank at which I opened my account. This was better than going into the bank to deposit which took days to clear because those were the rules of this branch. I could have saved myself a lot of heartache by having the positive attitude and letting it go. But no, I cluttered my mind and spirit with crap and my attachment to being right.

This is what un-forgiveness does. It just hurts us. I haven't hurt the bank in any way. This bank wins in customer service surveys regularly and is doing very well. My anger and resentment hurt only me. It made my life difficult. Even a year later, I held resentment. That's ridiculous. It's taken practice and now I've improved my ability to let go of resentment and frustration. Not perfect, but improved. My heart and mind are definitely the better for it.

The Difference Between Forgiveness & Being a Doormat

We often equate forgiveness with forgetting. Forgiveness is about clearing out the negative emotions you are carrying around about a person or situation.

Remember though, that forgiving someone does not mean that they can continue to engage with you in a negative way. We forgive to regain our own internal balance and power. Addressing a problem, especially one that is reoccuring is part of reclaiming your power just as forgiving the situation is about reclaiming your power. Forgiveness doesn't give the other person a "pass" on their behavior. Instead, it allows you to come to situations with more clarity, grace and strength. We clear our heads and are able to refocus on our own interests and goals.

One of My Stories: I was upset with a co-worker. She was clearly wrong and didn't back me up when we were confronted by our boss. I was really upset. I withdrew. I was angry, I didn't want to speak to her and I decided I wouldn't and would do everything on my own. That year was my worst year. Without support, the job was really difficult. Instead of being realistic and focusing on what I wanted, I focused on being better than her and showing her.
Overall, my vision was cloudy. My heart was tight and I was short with the people around me. I was generally unable to relax. By focusing on my anger, I hurt myself, not her. It would have been much more healthy to speak to her about the situation with the intention of reconciliation and to then make decisions from that point. It didn't mean that I was to allow her to not support me when I needed it and it was warranted. By clearing the air and clearing my heart and anger, I would have been much more able to see my year with clarity and peace. The brain works so much better this way. When we focus on the positive, blood flow is directed to the pre-frontal cortex which is the part of the brain that plans, sees solutions, finds new ways and is creative. By focusing on the negative, I diverted blood flow to the lower reptilian parts of my brain. This made me rush to solutions that were inadequate or just plain wrong.
Forgiveness allows us to release the negative in our lives and clear out a way for more good to come in. It allows the brain to focus on the positive.
Remember, forgiveness clears mental and emotional space which enables us to more easily be our best selves. It's a act of self-interest.

Holding Yourself Back?

Many times we begin to envision what we want. We get excited about it and a smile may come to our face as we contemplate a new state of being.

Then, because we don't see a clear way to achieve that state or goal, we slough off the feeling and settle back in to our present reality. Many times, my clients have given up on their most precious goals because they weren't sure how to achieve success.We discount those feelings as just wishful thinking and enroll ourselves in a life of more of the same.

I say NOW... RIGHT NOW, envision your desire! Feel it, see it, write it down, make a vision board, hire a coach, etc. Remember, you do the world no favors by staying small!

Let the feeling and thought permeate you. Running away from the feelings and thoughts sends your brain and the universe the message that you aren't ready. Feeling the feelings and envisioning the outcomes helps your brain create and find new pathways. Envisioning and feeling your success helps spirit/universal energy align itself to your desires, opening pathways miraculously. Now is the time to install your own new mental and spiritual patterns to get to where you want to be.

Go for it!

For a free report on how to do Visioning,
click here and choose "I'm Interested"

"Let yourself be silently drawn by the stronger pull of what you love." ~~Rumi

Top 5 Reasons To Forgive

1. Peaceful Heart
2. Better Relationships
3. More Money
4. Get Out of Debt
5. Clearer Mind, Clearer Thinking
   

Top 7 Forgiveness Misconceptions

1. If I forgive, that gives the other person a "pass". Forgiveness is about letting go of the negative feelings you harbor about a person, situation or institution. The other person may still have work to do on themselves. Their work is their business. We don't have to carry it around with us.
   
2. Forgiving means the other person can continue to do negative things to me. Unconditional forgiveness does NOT mean becoming an unconditional doormat. We can release the negative feelings we have about a person or thing and still decide from a place of strength and love to limit the types of interactions we have with them and put in place healthy boundaries.
   
3. They didn't make amends so I can't forgive them. Our own internal forgiveness is NOT dependent on the actions of the other person. Forgiveness is an internal act on our part of releasing negativity
   
4. Not forgiving others affects them and not me. When we harbor negative feelings they sit within us and become our focus. The feelings stagnate and cloud our hearts and minds. It has a major impact on us and on our relationships. One great metaphor is "resentment is like drinking poison in the hopes another will die."
   
5. Forgiveness is about people, not institutions or situations. We often forget that resenting institutions is just as bad as resenting people. Resenting everything the government does or hating the bank only incurs more negative feelings within you. By focusing on those feelings you garner more of the same in your life. Do you want more money? Love the bank and everything they do. Let go of any anger, irritation, ire or resistance. Watch your relationship with money, the government, etc. transform.
   
6. Forgiving yourself is not as important as forgiving others. Forgiving yourself is the ultimate. Many times we think we're mad at others and we're really mad at ourselves. Other times we continuously beat ourselves up for the same patterns or behaviors. Practice forgiveness of yourself to break the cycle.
   
7. Certain offenses are unforgivable. Remember, forgiveness is about what's in us. It's not about the other person. Forgiveness does NOT mean we condone the behavior. It means we release it's hold on our hearts and reclaim our power for a happy and prosperous life.